Careering Solo

The other day I received a new CD from Gus Oog (the greatest unknown songwriter of our generation). He called me the same day, so excited because he'd finally gotten his songs to sound the way he wanted them. Four of the songs were familiar to me. Two of them (Twelve Step Recovery & Six Ways To Roll A Seven) I had written lyrics for, but they were rejected. The other two (Pigs Are Smarter Than Dogs & Eleventh Sub Free) had been previously released in Underwater Welders CDs.

As you may have guessed, Gus's enthusiasm was merely fuel for my own disappointment. I love Gus's songs, and often we would talk about how they'd never been done justice. The perfect versions existed in my head, and I always thought that they were Gus's perfect versions, too. That was the saddest thing for me, not the fate of these songs, but the falsity of our connection. I guess I should have known when he rejected my lyrics and wouldn't tell me why. My version of Twelve Step Recovery was called, simply, Beautiful:



By the time I met you I'd already met a few
beautiful ladies.
They were wild unfair
beasts with golden hair.
I would gladly leave them all just to be with you,
but they already left.
They were wild unfair
beast with golden hair,
the scent they left behind still fills the air.

You called me from a payphone while you were on a date
so you could complain.
He's not tall enough,
talks a little rough.
Can't a man be beautiful and still be big and strong?
Where did you go wrong?
You wanted him to be
a little more like me.
Maybe you'll come over after all.

BRIDGE
Beautiful things never last too long.
Hold on to love that will love you.
Beautiful people go round and round.

I'm so glad you stopped by, I love to look at you.
Want a cup of tea?
I know you want me to
fall in love with you,
but by the time I met you I'd already met a few
beautiful ladies.
They were wild unfair
beasts with golden hair.
The scent they left behind still fills the air.


These are the lyrics he ended up using, as best as I can discern them.

I'm so glad to speak with you. Hello, my name is Brad.
I'm an alcoholic.
We've got twelve steps to
help us make it through.
I admit I'm powerless. I can't manage life.
I'm an alcoholic.
We've got twelve steps to
help us make it through
when we've lost everything except our life.

BRIDGE
Twelve little steps make the world go round.
If you're not sure phone your sponsor.
Twelve little steps to recovery.

I woke up in the gutter I guess one too many times.
I'm an alcoholic.
A power greater than me
is needed to set me free.
Keep it simple, stupid. Stinking thinking stinks.
I'm an alcoholic.
Awareness, acceptance, action,
the keys to satisfaction,
and twelve steps to recovery.