If I Were An Album

I'm tired of being a cookie-cutter Beatles fan. I refuse to get excited because Paul McCartney is getting favorable reviews. After all, he made plenty of great albums that got lousy reviews (why is "lousy" a normal adjective for "reviews" but for very little else? When have you ever seen lice crawling on a review? That is a rhetorical question!). But that doesn't matter to me anymore. Because from now on my favorite band is the Underwater Welders and all my excitement is saved for their new album, Not a Sizemore, due out in mid-late Fall.

As well as the title track, I veritably drip with anticipation to hear

Tacked to My Cubicle (UK Release has the much more intriguing title Pinned to My Cubicle)
Calculating the Gratuity
Getting Away with a Chiminea
Last of the Red Pushpins (Tacked to My Cubicle remix)
Two Teas From One Bag (Tea for Two remix)
I Don't Know What Torrid Means
Lord of the Rings Three Made Me Gay
Stand On Me
Last Time I Do That (with no shoes on)
If The Glove Doesn't Fit Try a (Civil) Suit
The Last Song's Always Sad